Friday, December 11, 2009

A contest. In honor of the one who used to be nice.

My husband is currently sitting in a dentist’s chair having ten (TEN!) teeth pulled. Let me repeat that. TEN. TEETH. PULLED. RIGHT NOW.

Which means, instead of blogging, I should be in the kitchen making mashed potatoes or liquefying all of those processed foods he likes so much. (Look, I don't cook, okay? If he wants a cookie, then I'm his girl.)

Since The Husband's going to be miserable and thus make me miserable and all that miserableness is going to spill over onto this miserable blog, I figure I might as well do something to lessen all the misery.

And, ta da! I just happen to have in my possession a $20 gift card to Barnes & Noble. If I had received this gift card even two weeks ago, I'd have spent it already. But no. I received it after I discovered the new love of my life a.k.a. eReader and had sworn off buying books for good.

Actually, I did go to B&N to browse around. I almost bought a New Moon calendar (no, really, I need a calendar!) and a pair of book ends. They were chess pieces, one red and one white. Just like the cover of Breaking Dawn. But they didn't match our decor. And they cost more than my $20 gift card budget allowed.

So, rather than let it sit and waste away in my purse, I might as well have some fun and give it to someone who'll put it to good use.

Of course, I'm going to make you work for it. Below is a list of random facts about The Husband. All are true except for one. Care to take a guess at which one is false?

1. My husband has a tattoo of the Minnesota Vikings on his left shoulder.
2. He was an all-star hockey player when he was five years old.
3. When he was just a kid, he once took a snow mobile into a fence while going 60 miles an hour.
4. He is completely deaf in his right ear.
5. He is poop-in-your-pants terrified of earthquakes.
6. He got so drunk on his 30th birthday he puked his guts out on the side of the road as I drove him home.
7. He eats Little Debbie snack cakes in bed every night.
8. He once won over a hundred thousand dollars playing the lottery.
9. He's been to every state in the U.S. except Alaska.
10. He's only read one book since I've known him.

Yep. All true. Except one.

I'm going to mix things up a bit this time. All participants will be eligible to win, regardless of being right or wrong.

The gift card can be redeemed online or in-store, so the winner can either provide an address where I'll be happy to mail the card OR I can supply the card number via e-mail so the winner can use the card online. Your call.

A winner will be randomly selected and announced Wednesday, December 16th.

Hmm, is there anything else? No? Okay, well, then...


* * *

Winner has been announced. Thanks for playing, peeps!


  1. Hmmm. I'm going to go with #8. All are intriguing though!!

  2. Uh, number 9? Just a guess. Hope he gets a couple of good pain meds, that procedure sounds like it is going to have some residual discomfort. Ouch.Oh, and will you reveal the answer? That's what we really want to know.

  3. Wow, I can't believe that all are true except for one! I have no idea. I'm going to guess #8. Can't wait to find out which is the right one!

  4. i was thinking #7 but that's maybe the reason why he has to get about 1/3 of his grill yanked {ouch!} and you're a baker and i'd think you'd bake him sweet snacks to eat in bed... so i'll say #5. you guys live in CA, how scared can he be?!

  5. I'm going with number one and thinking it is his right shoulder or a different team. No wonder your hub is having 10 teeth pulled after the life he has had!

  6. Okay, I'm going with #8. I have to believe that if he'd EVER won $100,000, it wouldn't matter if you went over your $20 B & N budget a bit!He HAS to have a Viking tatoo...he's from MN! All of us here do!

  7. I'm guessing #7. Why would he ever eat Little Debbie anything with all the baking you do?

  8. This is really hard! I'll go with #2 to be different from all the commenters above me!

  9. I have to agree with Rory...the first thing I thought is why would he eat processed goodies while you make all those wonderful goodies! I pick 7.

  10. This is such a fun idea! I'm going to guess #10.

  11. Are you serious? TEN TEETH?!? I didn't even know a dentist could pull 10 teeth in one day. Poor man! Good luck with the contest :)

  12. 8???? I have no idea but I am dying for you to reveal the answer!

  13. I'm goin with #8. I have no idea why anyone would HAVE to have 10 teeth pulled all at once but I hope to hell the dose his ass up good. I'm all about better living though chemistry. Hope he heals fast.

  14. I think #8 is not true (He once won over a hundred thousand dollars playing the lottery). But they're all interesting!

  15. I'm going to guess that #5 is true. Obviously, I'm not playing the game correctly.Is the Husband from out-of-state? My husband is from Texas. He is poop-in-your-pants terrified of earthquakes, too. People who aren't from California are always terrified of earthquakes. It's us natives who play "guess what that was on the richter scale" when a big one hits. The non-natives are puking their guts up or shitting their pants.

  16. yikes that sounds awful! good luck nurse stephanie ;)i'm going to go with number 4, though i must say it's a pathetic guess and i'm glad anyone can win this one :)

  17. #9 has to be false - how can you not be a reader but be a traveller? I could be totally way off. I hope #8 is true. My husband (to my disdain of course) loves to secretly purchase a lotto ticket or two. What I wouldn't give to have him win... :)

  18. so i can believe 1-6... it's the last four that throw me; all sound like the false culprit! C'mon... he has you to bake for him and he still eats Little Debbies daily? And ONE book? O-N-E?! (which begs the question: was it voluntary and for amusement or required and educational or what?) And if he won all that cash playing the lotto... ok, maybe that's somewhat plausible and I don't want it to be true cuz it's never gonna happen to me, too. I vote the whopper is having been to 49 states.

  19. Hmmmmmm. So, I think I will go with #9 even though I have absolutely no idea.That boy needs some ice cream after all those teeth being pulled!

  20. I'm guessing number 6. If I win, I am buying a book for your husband.

  21. I am going to guess #7 is not true. Seriously? you bake such yummy things he can't just eat little debbies. and if he does shame on him haha-L