Tuesday, March 24, 2009

The last twelve days of my life gone forever.

March 12: Borrow Twilight from J. Read first 30 pages. It was supposed to be a distraction. It would suffice. Meh.

March 13: Next hundred pages gone. Starting to become intrigued.

March 14: Husband returns from self-imposed week of solitary confinement. We spend a relaxing evening in. Another two hundred pages read while he watches college basketball. It's a win-win.

March 15: Finish Twilight. Start New Moon.

March 16: Itching to see the movie. Decide to finish series first. I think I've been sucked in. I'm powerless to stop it.

March 17: St. Patrick's Day. Frustrated that I have a wedding to attend right after work. Who gets married at four p.m. on a Tuesday?! Sneak in a few pages of New Moon as soon as we get home late that night.

March 18: Read, read, read. I think I went to work. Can't be certain of anything at this point except that I. Am. Fucking. In love.

March 19: J has let a friend borrow Breaking Dawn, the fourth book. In a panic that she might not get it back in time, I rush out to purchase it. In hardcover. Because I'm going to want to own the series anyway. It doesn't matter that I still haven't finished the second book.

March 20: Arrive home from work at four. Jump in the shower and dry hair in preparation of a date with The Husband. Read until we leave. Finish New Moon. Tell Husband that I'm not starting the third book, Eclipse, until Monday. I need a break.

March 21: Devour first half of Eclipse.

March 22, 4:30pm: Take J to see Twilight. I can't resist. I have to see it while it's still being played in a Theatre. No force strong enough to keep my away.

March 22, sometime between 4:30pm and 6:30pm: Giggle uncontrollably. Eat my weight in Red Vines.

March 22, 7:00pm: Stop at Target. Purchase Twilight DVD. Purchase Eclipse. In hardcover. Assure J that I am perfectly aware I'm obsessed and it's becoming a problem.

March 22, 7:30pm: Arrive home. Husband checks out my purchases, gives me an odd look. “Yes,” I say, almost challengingly, “It’s a problem. I’m aware. Now stay out of the bedroom for the next two hours.”

March 22, 8:00pm: Watch Twilight on DVD. Sigh repeatedly. Decide to read Twilight again as soon as I finish series.

March 23: Read, read, read. I have a very vague recollection of folding laundry.

March 23, 1:45pm: Husband leaves for dentist appointment. Watch Twilight for a third time. Clear away all evidence that I was ever anywhere near the TV.

March 23, 4:00pm: Quick trip to Costco with The Husband. Purchase Twilight and New Moon to complete the series. Husband picks up some other items, like milk and cheese. I have a distant memory of eating these things myself once before.

March 23. 6:00pm: Finish Eclipse. Absorb first 150 pages of Breaking Dawn. Begin to cry as I realize I’m nearing the end. Contemplate sending threatening letters to the author in hopes that it will speed up publication of fifth book.

March 24, 6:30am: Wake up cranky, but can’t figure out why. Oh, that’s right. I have to go to work today. Which is the only thing keeping me away from Edward and Bella.

March 24, 9:00am: Contemplate turning in resignation so I can get back to reading.

March 24, 9:30am: Google “clinic for the Twilight obsessed.”

March 24, 10:00am: Wonder if my life will ever be the same.

March 24, 10:15am: Click on “publish” and wait for all readers to completely abandon me.


  1. LOL! You are definitely madly obsessed with this series. I totally know the feeling :-) If I’m correct the whole obsession thing around this series began in april 2008. But I've seen some rumblings online that people aren't happy with Breaking Dawn. It’s even been compared with Godfather Part III. Since I haven’t read the series I really don’t have any idea. So please don’t throw rocks at me (I’m a nice person, I swear!)I hope you don't have to wait too long for the next book to come out.

  2. I have also heard bad things about Breaking Dawn... comments like it takes a weird sci-fi turn of events. I'm trying not to let it bother me. So far, the first 160 pages have been great. Maybe since I'm going into it expecting the worst, I'll be pleasantly surprised? I hope so.

  3. Some critics heap unreasonable expectations on authors! Breaking dawn is just fine. I think some critics were expecting characters to die or some Harry Potterish thing like that. I enjoyed Breaking Dawn both times I read it. hehe. I can't say I am as obsessed, only because I haven't seen the movie yet. I did buy all of the books though. And have read most of them at least twice.

  4. HOW have I resisted the lure of Twilight?? My sister read the books, along with her 14 year old, and they both loved them. I gotta dive in.

  5. I'll have to check it out. I went through a similar problem with Stephen King's Dark Tower series on a much smaller scale 'cause I had to wait for each one to be written. Good books are like a drug.

  6. Violet, I have no idea how I resisted Twilight for as long as I did. You need to get on it. Like, NOW. You'll thank me. Rory, no kidding! I've been going through withdrawals all day. I need my fix!

  7. Now you have me dying to read this series, and not wanting to read this series. Books like that are so great, but I have too many projects that I need to work on. I can't have that kind of distraction! Hmmm, I wonder if they have the first book at our library?

  8. You pretty much just described my life since I started reading right before Christmas.Second, I'm a Twi-hard fan (and proud of that completely geeky title) and I loved Breaking Dawn, but my mom just finished it today and she was annoyed with it...Third, I cried when I was finished. I was seriously starting to feel depressed, I missed me some Cullens. So I read them all again.And then I read Twilight a third time, well, I have half a chapter to go... I'm savoring it. Then I'll start New Moon...again... probably.I had a Twilight PARTY on Saturday and 15 of my closest friends came over and we swooned and giggled and sighed over Edward.And I've watched the DVD like 4 times now.Welcome to the club sista.

  9. LMAOLMAOLMAO.Did I say "LMAO"???

  10. Stephanie, I just have to share this latest entry with my 17-year-old daughter when she gets home from school.... She's hoping that one day she will find her "Edward Cullen".I told her I would not allow her to marry a vampire!!!!!!!!!!She wants me to read the series so badly and I haven't made the time to do it. Maybe I should???

  11. I am morally opposed to bandwagons, so this has no effect on me. No effect. Do you hear me? NO EFFECT! I WILL NOT READ THESE BOOKS!

  12. Gayle, months ago, when my sister asked me why I wouldn't read them, I said I don't have time for these books. I was right. But it's been so worth it.Marchelle, thank you. I'm damn proud to be a member. And not ashamed to admit it.Dot O, if your daughter finds EDWARD CULLEN you have to let her marry him! And, yes, you should absolutely read the books. Right now.Alias Mother, band wagon, schmand wagon. (Or something.) If a book is good, what else matters?

  13. I finished Breaking Dawn today, finally! I really liked it.

  14. What sucks is after you finish Breaking Dawn, you need fix so bad, but there's nothing you can do about it (Midnight Sun helped a little, but left me hanging). Is this what it's like to be addicted to crack??

  15. Julie, that's exactly why I won't read what's available of Midnight Sun. I think I'd be too depressed to be left hanging. I suppose I'll suck it up and wait till it's published. Sigh. Yes, these books are my drug of choice and I don't want help, thankyouverymuch.