Everything you never knew you wanted to know. About me.

So, that whole "about me" thing has really been weighing on my mind. Okay, not really, but I felt it was time to write something to explain myself a little better. Except, when I started to write my bio, everything that came out stunk to high Heaven. (Who can tell me where that saying came from?) So, I finally gave up trying and asked J to interview me. The following is the result of that.

By the way. J (or Justice) was named after a gold fish, just in case you were wondering. And I know what you're thinking. Who in their right mind names a goldfish "Justice?"

Justice: What is your name? Just kidding!

Stephanie: Geez.

Justice: Sorry, I had to. What do you like to do in your free time?

Stephanie: Take pictures, read, watch TV... Um, I can't think of anything else

Justice: Tell me about yourself. Just kidding. Just kidding.

Stephanie: I'm going to kill you.

Justice: Do you consider yourself successful?

Stephanie: Hm. That's deep.

Justice: I know. By the way, just say "skip" if you don't want to answer a question.

Stephanie: If "successful" means I'm happy and have a good, healthy marriage, and I'm able to spend time with people I love, doing things I love, then yes, I consider myself successful.

Justice: Good answer.

Stephanie: Dork

Justice: No, really.

Stephanie: Waiting...

Justice: What are your pet peeves?

Stephanie: People who leave their turn signals on. Stupid people in general.

Justice: Ok, ok. Have you ever had a life changing moment?

Stephanie: Yes, but it's kinda stupid. My life changing moment was the day T told me to read the Pioneer Woman's website and I was kicked in the face with this passion for photography.

Justice: That's not stupid.

Stephanie: Thanks.

Justice: What is the weirdest thing about you?

Stephanie: Um, I check out the shoes of the person in the stall next to me whenever I'm in a public restroom.

Justice: HA. If you could do anything what would it be?

Stephanie: Quit my job and travel around the country in a pimped-out RV. What do you think is the weirdest thing about me?

Justice: Hmm... Maybe your pet peeves. They make you really mad. REALLY MAD.

Stephanie: Do you think I have anger issues?

Justice: Only when you get irritated. Otherwise no. What is your most annoying habit?

Stephanie: This is hard. I just looked over at Jon and asked him what he thought my most annoying habit was. He paused and started thinking about it and I said, "Be careful, this could cause a fight." He said my sniffles. I sniffle a lot 'cause I think I have a chronic runny nose. What do YOU think my most annoying habit is?

Justice: Umm... Let me think.

Stephanie: This should be good.

Justice: I don't know. Honestly. Ohhhh. No. This could start a fight.

Stephanie: Tell me!

Justice: Ok. CLEAN FREAK!!!! *hides in corner*

Stephanie: You're just mad 'cause I don't let you drip water all over the floor when you take a shower.

Justice: What do you think is the single best decision you've made in your life so far? By the way, I'm getting some of these from websites. Questioning is harder than it seems.

Stephanie: Jon said it was marrying him. What a turd. Actually, that was the first thing that popped into my head, too. I haven't had to make too many major, life-altering decisions in my life yet... except marriage.

Justice: Interesting. I don't know if I should ask this one, so say "skip" if you want to. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

Ohhh, I got a more pleasant one. What is your most treasured memory?

Stephanie: That's tough. I don't think I can pinpoint one specific memory. I treasure all my holiday memories. Like Thanksgiving at T's and Christmas at Mom's and the two of us driving up to Utah to surprise T for her birthday... things like that.

Justice: I'm getting the vibe that family is very important to you. Is family very important to you? Do you treasure family moments? Are you sentimental? (I came up with that one!) (Woo!)

Stephanie: Yes, yes, and yes... very much.

Justice: Ok. Now, Stephanie, earlier in the interview you told me that your youngest sister was your favorite. Why is this?

Stephanie: Um, I don't think I said that

Justice: Oh. Um, must be a technical error. Or something. Who are you voting for in the election?

Stephanie: Obama, of course.

Justice: Who is the most influential person in your life?

Stephanie: Ooh, that's a good one. Actually, I don't think anyone has a very strong influence on me. Jon would tell you I don't listen to anyone and I make my own opinions. I'm very stubborn and opinionated.

Justice: So, I take it God is the most influential person in your life? Or your sister?

Stephanie: Well, which sister?

Justice: Me.

Stephanie: God, definitely.

Justice: Do you consider yourself a morning person? Or a night person? Or an afternoon person?

Stephanie: I think really early morning is the most peaceful time of day, before everyone else is awake and starting to bother me. It's when I'm most productive. BUT, I am not a morning person. I hate hearing my alarm go off. I snooze it eight times every day. I am a night owl at heart. It would be incredibly easy for me to fall back into the habit of staying up and waking up late.

Justice: What is the most important thing to you in any relationship?

Stephanie: Trust. And candy. This is why you and I are so close.

Justice: That's funny. The first thing that popped into my mind was honesty. What holiday do you enjoy the most and how do you celebrate it?

Stephanie: Christmas. We wake up early, open presents, visit family, laugh a lot, and eat until we fall over in a food coma.

Justice: Yeah. Christmas is good.

Stephanie: Yeah.

Justice: My favorite, too. Anyways. Aww crap. I had a really good question, but I f- Never mind. I remember. Do you like giving advice or receiving advice? Or, do you like listening or talking?

Stephanie: I can do both, but I have to be in the mood. Sometimes I don't want to talk or listen. Sometimes I do. I don't really like giving advice because people don't typically take it.

Justice: What is something that you hate to think about?

Stephanie: Money.. and how we're ever going to be able to afford a house in freaking southern California.

Justice: What is your favorite month or favorite type of weather. (Damn, I wish it was raining.)

Stephanie: Me, too. I love December because of Christmas. I love The Holidays. I love it when it's cold and rainy.

Justice: What is one thing you would not be able to live without?

Stephanie: Oh gosh. Probably my laptop. Remember when my battery died a couple weeks ago? I almost had a panic attack.

Justice: What is one thing that you hate doing, yet you seem to have to do it all the time?

Stephanie: Work. So, Justice, what's your favorite food? BESIDES CEREAL.

Justice: Orange chicken. Duh. What's yours?

Stephanie: Can I say chocolate? Or do I have to pick real food?

Justice: Real food.

Stephanie: Shit, that's hard. I love ALL food. A big juicy steak or lasagna or meatloaf or macaroni and cheese... I'm hungry.

Justice: What kind of situations do you try to avoid?

Stephanie: Any that involve large crowds of people I don't know.

Justice: Do you consider yourself shy or outgoing? Or anti-social?

Stephanie: Anti-social.

Justice: Is that why you often ignore phone calls, even from your family?

Stephanie: Now you sound like mom. Yes, I ignore my phone because I don't like talking to people, but I ignore phone calls from family only when I'm watching TV and I don't want to get up and find my phone.

Justice: If you have ever wanted to be traumatized, what would you want to be traumatized by?

Stephanie: What the hell kind of question is that?

Justice: Ok, what is your favorite color?

Stephanie: Pink, what's yours?

Justice: Mine's gray or light yellow or white. What do you think about gas prices?

Stephanie: I'm just glad I drive a little Toyota... and I hope the prices continue to go down.

Justice: Did you know that Toyota's are made in Japan and by buying products from other countries we are supporting their military powers against us? Are you against America?

Stephanie: Shut up, turd.

Justice: Do you like watching the news?

Stephanie: No, it's sad and it's always the same.

Justice: Would you ever try to grow a tree in your backyard, if you had a backyard, and do you want a backyard?

Stephanie: Um, yes, I want a backyard... and yes, I'd probably try to grow a tree. I've always wanted a tree house.

Justice: What was your favorite subject in school?

Stephanie: Political science. Yours?

Justice: Literature.

Stephanie: What kind of grades are you getting right now?

Justice: Ummm

Stephanie: Hmm?

Justice: I think a B+ in HONORS History. It's hard. B+ in Honors Lit. A+ in normal science. And A in piano.

Stephanie: Geez, how many honors classes are you in?

Justice: Two.

Stephanie: Gross.

Justice: I can't think of any more questions.

Stephanie: How does it feel knowing you got all the smarts in the family?

Justice: I feel that you all should treat me more special than everyone else. I deserve special treatment, bitches. That's how I feel.

Stephanie: Oh, but you are "special". Do you ride the short yellow bus?

Justice: I don't ride buses. I'm anti bus.

Stephanie: Oh, yeah... mom and dad make you walk. Haha.

Justice: Actually, they drive me, for your information.

Stephanie: 'Cause they don't think you can walk on your own? 'Cause you're "special?"

Justice: How does it feel to know that you're a bitch?

Stephanie: You are.

Justice: I can't think of any more questions to ask.

Stephanie: What else should I tell people about me?

Justice: That I'm your sister, not your daughter. And to warn them not to get on your bad side, because you are a bitch.

Stephanie: I thought you were trying not to swear?

Justice: Oh. Well, I decided that online it doesn't count.

Stephanie: That's nice.

Justice: It doesn't feel bad when I do it typing.

Stephanie: What's your favorite movie?

Justice: The Notebook. Or Twilight. Even though I haven't seen it.

Stephanie: You can't say that if you haven't seen it! Retard.

Justice: What's yours?

Stephanie: Under the Tuscan Sun, Love Actually, Sex and the City, Chocolat, Something's Gotta Give, the Holiday, Walk the Line, and every Disney movie. Is Twilight your favorite book?

Justice: Mmmmm yeah. Or For the Roses. But right now Twilight. Probably because I just read it.

Stephanie: Did you finish Public Secrets?

Justice: No. I have like 50 pages left, but for some reason I feel like the book could end right now. She's basically with the guy. And that was one of the main problems in the book. And then to find out who murdered her brother... I don't want to really find out.

Stephanie: I'm going to be seriously disappointed in you if you don't finish it.

Justice: Like I care. So. How'd you like your interview?

Stephanie: It was very serious.

Justice: Interesting. Let's go get some ice cream.

Stephanie: Okay.

The end.